Drama Is Bad For Relationships

Drama Is Bad For Relationships – here’s how to fix that

Confession: I hate divas and drama queens. I hate entitlement and histrionics.

To me, drama = insecurity.

Drama makes good television but bad relationships.

So when my boyfriend said one of the best things about me was that I was “low maintenance”, I told him that was one of the biggest compliments he could give me.

That’s because I like to think I fit the description of “low maintenance”: “someone who is easy to please, does not require constant pampering, attention or gifts or things done ‘their way or no way’. One who is genuinely happy to enjoy the company of others. Easy-going, unselfish and usually a joy to be around.”  (Urban Dictionary.)

But the fact is, my boyfriend has a lot to do with how I feel around him.  

He brings out the best in me.

And I think it comes down to this:

  • When you feel safe, you let go of your need for control.
  • When you let go of your need for control, you surrender to the present.
  • When you surrender to the present, you feel so much happier.

The trick is to:

  • Trust yourself.
  • Be with someone who makes you feel safe.

If you can do that, the rest is easy.

Guideline #14: The More You Micromanage, the More Friction There Will Be in a Relationship.

What do you think of drama queens and relationships? Do you agree that the more insecure a person is, the more drama they generate, attract, and bring into their relationships?

Exercise 1 : Trust Yourself

Build trust (in yourself, in life) by continually challenging yourself to step outside your comfort zone. Try one new thing this week.

When you put yourself into new situations you build confidence. Confidence allows you to trust yourself to handle adversity and be open and receptive to new experiences. You learn to ‘roll’ with things. You become more easy-going (and interesting!), which is a very attractive quality in people.

Exercise 2: Feel Safe

Only accept people into your life that are dependable, honest, communicate and make you feel good just being around them.

Sometimes it’s hard to let go of people that aren’t good for you, so here’s the thing. Make a list of quality people and try to spend more time with them. Plan an activity with one of them this week. The more time you spend with people that make you feel good (authentic, happy, carefree, safe), the less time you are willing to give those who make you feel bad.

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” ~ Jim Rohn

Next: What’s Your Dating Resume?

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Author Adele Frizzell/Sophie Winters

Sophie Winters is the author of two books on dating and relationships. Sophie’s real name is Adele Frizzell. She enjoys travel, hiking, and lifting heavy weights. She is a competitive bench presser, certified yoga teacher, and mountain addict. She loves inspiring people to get more out of life.

Her first book, The Cha Cha Club Dating Man-ifesto is written for all the single ladies, while her second relationship advice book, It’s Not You, It’s Us: A Guide for Living Together Without Growing Apart is for couples who want more joy, intimacy and respect in their relationship. She is working on her third book.


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